Gosia began clipping and filing away, occasionally reaching for a long, pokey thing to get under the nails. “The ones who want colour normally go for black,” she noted. Sensing my panic, she swiftly assured me that most men opt for a simple tidy-up instead. Beyond the fact that I was going to be miles better at basketball in an hour’s time, I didn’t know what to expect. So I ventured to Cowshed, where a woman called Gosia made me a green tea, placed a big, fluffy cushion on my lap and got me to lower my feet – exhausted from a whole morning’s music journalism – into a bucket of warm water. Clearly, someone needed to investigate this phenomenon, and that someone had to be me. If you’ve been closely following the Balmain 2016 spring/summer collection – if not, what do you even do with your free time? – you’ll know that exposing your toes has hit the catwalk, too. Kobe Bryant, Michael Jordan and Shaquille O’Neal are other hoop-shooters who like to get their cuticles oiled, while David Beckham – who else? – represents footballers who love a “mani-pedi”. In 2014, NBA legend LeBron James posted pictures of him mid-pedi on Instagram with the caption: “Have to take care of your dogs Men! It’s part of our life blood!” I had been sent for a pedicure, you see, because apparently they’re becoming quite the thing on the growing male beauty scene.